WHEN THE BITCH BITCHES AROUND, WHO'S GONNA BITCH THEM?

As harsh as the post title, I'm feeling a little bit piss with these bitches. No wonder people wouldn't get where to they are now? And they don't get what they want, or if they do get it, it won't last.

Its so hard to have a new life, its so hard to have a quiet and nice life. Sometimes I ignore what people say about myself out there. I don't even care what will people says about me. I know one thing, I'm responsible for what I do, and I don't involve others in my own matters.

This is what we call a harmony life. People bitching around you and sometimes it will makes you feel a little bit uncomfortable. It sometimes could hurt our love ones feelings. We could end up in a fight if we don't know how to tackle the situation.

Don't the bitches see, that what they bitch will come right back to them. Not entirely immediately, but they soon will have a life, and maybe kids... don't they are afraid that the bitches that they bitch around would take affect to their life or maybe their kids life?

Why can't the bitch just hold their peace and let others continue life in happy and harmony surrounding?

To all the bitch out there... stop bitching, coz it will hurt you too someday!~!!!

My First Day in the 30s

Wow.... I'm for real.... I am in my 30s now... I left my 20s yesterday, and now I'm in my 30s. My 1st day as a 30 year old woman... I'm old.

But the best thing about it now is that, I'm 30 and I have my hun hun to celebrate it with. Well not at the moment, as he's working. He'll be taking me out for a dinner later tonite after breaking fast and after he finished working around 7pm, I think.

I think, I'm having the best birthday celebration this year ever... He's with me and im celebrating it with him. Not that I don't want to celebrate it with my family, but I guess, things different for me this year.

And my birthday is the same birthday with he's youngest son, Zikry. We went shopping for Zikry's birthday present last nite.. I'll be Zikry gonna love it..

I hope this is a new begining for me, and for him. I'm hoping for so much more from him one day. I do hope, but I don't dare to ask. It is still a big step for him to decide. Let the time do its charm, shall we... :D

Anyway, happy birthday Nomie...

What's the meaning of marriage???

What the meaning of marriage? It would be a meaningful definition for those who really really ready for marriage, and appreciate marriage life. But what about those who were force into marriage, accidents, get married and then realize that they made a big mistake by getting married.. What would it make a marriage definition from these kind of people???

For instance, this couple XY, were in love for many many years. Everyone sees them as a perfect couple. Both are handsome and beautiful and both also very very rich!! They got married and a very grand and expensive ceremony.. but the marriage last only for 6 month...

Then this other couple, couple ZA. They broke up after 3 years of relationship. But the got back together and get married. They have 1 kid. The baby is only 6 month old when they got divorced and now regret of being divorce.

Then there is this another couple. Married for nearly 14 years with 3 kids aged 14, 8 and 5. They got divorce because the wife keep on accusing the husband having an affair with another woman, which is not! And when in the first place, the 'wife' is actually who force both of them into marriage when the husband is not ready. Why people do this? Why want to commit when you know that you're not ready? Why want to jeopardize the sacred of marriage by getting a divorce. In Islam, divorce is an act that is 'halal' but Allah really hates. Even as ancient Catholic, when you divorce, you eventually cannot be married to another person because of the vow that they made, 'Till death do us part!" Why be married to other when the other person is still up and alive. I don't understand.

And when you parents says this and that about your partner, saying that he's not good enough for you. When is it that that person would be good enough for them? No body perfect in this world. When you found your soulmate and you are truly in a way that never be apart from him, definitely you determine to be with him. Its just that it would take some times for both of you to understand each other well. When the right time comes, everything would go as in everyone wants it to be.

Sometimes, I'm sick being someelse that I'm not. Sick of pretending and hurting myself. Now that I'm happy with what I have, i want to enjoy every single little bits I have. Coz we don't know, when our time will come.

And I'm babbling again on 1st Ramadhan... whats with me... ish...

Anyway, SELAMAT BERPUASA AND SELAMA MENUNAIKAN SOLAT TARAWIKH!!!

1st Ramadhan together

Time flies so fast. And its Ramadhan now.. coming up tomorrow. This year, I'm celebrating my 1st Ramadhan with my Hun Hun. The 1st for me and for him. I can't recall when was the last time I had my Ramadhan with one of my ex-es.

Nadya arrived safely in Sibu yesterday. It was a good surprise to mama, papa, Afrie and Turi. Hahaha... here comes my small family. We will be celebrating Raya in a very good mood this year. As far as I'm concern, my brother is getting engage and Nadya is around too. Plus, Hun Hun is coming over to Sibu to fetch me home to Miri. Yes, Miri is my home now. Sibu is my hometown. What am I babbling about?? I have no idea.

As for now, I'm so excited for 'sahur' tomorrow morning. Seriously I am. Apart from my Astro has been disconnected (ouch!!!) hehehehe... I'll be watching Grey's Anatomy back to back tomorrow... Yiihaa....

I'm outta here...

First cut is the deepest....

The honeymoon is over. I have a theory that I would like this honeymoon to last forever, so that we could have a good relationship going on between the two of us. But yesterday shows that I was wrong. I want to prove them wrong, by saying that in a relationship, there is no such thing as forever honeymoon. I want to make it last, but it takes two to tango. I can't do this alone. I need help from him too.

He gave me silent treatment last nite, and its painful. Painful nite... We talked, but not as talkative as before. I don't even dare to bring up the issue. I don't even feel that I'm mocking him by saying that he's English is not that good. Seriously, it was suppose to be a joke. But i guess he took it seriously.

When he came back from work, as usual, I treat him the way I do every time he comes home. The only problem is that, we don't talk. I don't dare to talk because I'm scared that I'll hate myself with what I have to say. So I bite my tongue and hold my peace. And he did the same. We only talked for necessary things. I keep on saying "I'm sorry"... and he keep on answering, "forget about it. I admit I'm not that good!" which makes me feels more guilty. Have I hurt him again this time??? What should I do?

At this point, last nite, I cried. I'm tired. I'm tired of living in this body of mine. Tired of trying so hard just to impress other people. Trying so hard to be other people, instead of myself. I'm tired. I do have a thought that I don't wanna live anymore. I wanna stop breathing and just die. I hate to feel this way... This is one of the reason why I'm like this... gosh, being in love is so painful...

Praise to Allah

It was a week ago, Hun Hun and I decided to escort convoy for Maktab Perguruan to Bintulu. It was a tiring escort, as they are using motorcycle below 150cc, as we are riding 250cc and over. But riding back home to Miri was the best…We definitely trust each other. His handling was superb. Doing corners at 140kmph, top speed at 240kmph and running through the cars in town like two crazy couple. (We are insanely in love and crazy for adrenalin).

This week, 7 August – 9 August, suppose to be Crocker Ride, join by Mirisportbikers, Brunei bikers, Labuan Bikers and KK Bikers. Hun Hun did suggest that we should join them. But we canceled it last minute as he’s working and for me, its rushing, and I don’t like to rush things.

About an hour ago, I receive a news from Hun Hun saying that, 5 bikers down in Temburong, Brunei. 2 cars collides and 2 people died on the spot. Luckily, our bikers only suffers serious injuries. But I’m still in shock that my best girlfriend was one of the victim who involve in this accident. And as I’m writing this, she’s still in Emergency Room, trying to recover.

As I spoke to Hun Hun over the phone just now, we both thanks to Allah, the Al-Mighty, that we didn’t join for this Crocker Ride. I would be guessing, I’ll be kissing the road 3 hours ago, and now painfully in Emergency Room with doctors and nurses around me to save me. Or maybe I would be in the morgue. If say that Hun Hun get out of this accident safely, he’ll be facing a hard and painful time, meeting the parents. So much of strong bonding. But praise to Allah, that we’ve decided to stay, instead of going.

Maybe HIM have a bigger agenda for the both of us, that we might overlooked it. And maybe HIM wants the both of us to take note on what’s happening around you.

To the accident victim’s family, my deepest condolences. We’re sorry for our riders mistakes that takes the life of your love ones. To the down bikers, get well soon. We pray for your health from far.

Its been a while

Its been a while since my last post in May. Been very busy with work and with life. After the April incident, I met someone which I can call a soulmate. He's in every way have the same interest as I do. It took a while when we both realize that we both are in love. I hope I'm making the right move.

There's a lot of incident happens after my last post. My not so happy but happy Jakarta trip with my soulmate sister, Kartina. The relationship grew stronger for both of us (me n Hun hun). Workloads exploding, my final exams, H1N1 and many more....

My favorite director passed away few weeks ago. She will be missed. MJ mystery death. And so it goes...

I will try to make it up to write more, but at this moment, I'm having a writer's block!!! :D